adesso

Almost too tired to post tonight. Almost.

But something very lovely happened today. My practice is pretty much back up to full tilt with about a third of my patients being seen in the office. Same number of daily patients as the pre-pandemic days but now, so much extra time and care is taken to put on and remove personal protective equipment, wash hands and every surface after a patient leaves. It was never part of my staff's job description, nor mine, to sterilize each room after every patient interaction. So many things are unusual but now common place. Like my administrative staff, Vicki, Kyle and Tanya, constantly leaving their desks to clean a room or usher a patient in through the back door. They never, ever say "no". Who deserves such a marvellous team? And Christine, my nurse practitioner who has been working with us for almost a year. I think it is a year this coming weekend. She is my fellow warrior. I see her running from room to room. I hear her counselling our patients with such great compassion and care. I know how skilled she is. Who deserves such a strong and loyal pandemic partner?

Our lives are at risk, every day and I can see the strain creeping in but we pause for lunch to enjoy each other's company, tell terrible jokes, listen to great music and share our fears and concerns. I am honoured to work with you.

Today, a lovely patient of mine named Nella came in for an appointment. She has been with me for 30 years. She brought an entire troop of Italian ladies with her when she jointed the practice. All of them had immigrated from Italy in the 50's and 60's, lived close to each other, raised their kids together and helped build one of the strongest communities in Guelph. And I have had the privilege of taking care of them. Today, Nella brought a gift. I don't think she really needed an appointment. I think she was there just to encourage me. She handed me eleven envelopes all sealed and all with donations inside: Maria, Luigia, Maria, Orietta, Nella, Elaine, Nicoletta, Irma, Enrica, Lena and Norine. Thank you. Best of friends for decades, still caring for each other as they slide through their eighties and still so generous. Our country was built on the strength and integrity of women like you. Our heart and soul.

Nella left one more gift; a bottle of merlot called, 'adesso' which means 'now' in Italian. NOW. Not yesterday, not tomorrow but now. Now is where we are learning to live. It is where, I imagine, these women have lived most of their lives. Here and now with our beautiful neighbours and friends, our families, our communities and in this great country. Yesterday is gone and what we had then, we may never have again. That may be a good thing. Have you let go yet? We should. Holding on to the way things were makes me anxious and sometimes depressed. Looking to the future is too difficult and uncertain. So, that leaves 'now'. In this moment, with this bottle of wine and these donations from these amazing women. Do I need more than that? No. Every difficult, harsh, grieving, anguishing, terrifying, beautiful, magical and miraculous minute is worth cherishing now.

Thank you Nella and thank you ladies for leaving me with your wisdom and strength today. Well worth the post.

Carry on beautiful people. You are still smashing it!

Anne-Marie